THE ALLIANCE OF INDEPENDENT BLACK WRITERS
My Journey in Healing
My Journey in Healing
Ways to Heal Completely:
Know that your body is perfect and will heal perfectly.
Allow time for the healing process. Patience is key.
Don’t share your ailment with everyone. If you can help it, the less energy spent on it the better.
Trust your instincts in reference to your medical care. In my experience I found that often physicians don’t have the time or care to do what it takes to help you. You have to find those who will. So don’t be ashamed or afraid to change doctors.
Don’t let the insurance boundaries affect your treatment. For some reason many of things that can heal you are looked on by Western medicine as stupid. Again, trust your instincts, do what it takes to get the care that you need to heal. Soon we will restructure the system to actually aid in our healing.
Don’t give up. It’s not over till you give up. Don’t! give up.
Keep peace in your space. Avoid fear and negativity or resentment during healing.
Laugh as much as you can. Find joy in every moment.
Eat to heal. Ingest things that feed your system. Also eat stuff that makes you happy, but as stated more importantly, eat things the bodies needs.
Drink water,
I always say, “You know how it is when you don’t do the dishes and they sit in the sink and get crusty with food on them?"
Imagine that in your body, food just sitting and getting crusty and hard. Now you know if you let the dishes sit in water overnight, it makes them a billion times easier to wash the next day. Keep your system flowing, drink water and more water.
Rest. Don’t just get sleep, get rest. Rest helps healing.
Stop with the sugar and the coffee. No, don’t drink alcohol, Rest.
Whoever, or what ever may have caused the situation, release the anger towards them. Live in love. Peace. Breathe peace as much as possible.. You see pain really makes you want to hurt someone. Those thoughts distract from healing. They are like a deflecting field to healing. Let it go.
Let go. When you finally find a health care practitioner you trust, relax and let them help you. If you are getting a massage, let the practitioner know how they are affecting you and what you are feeling. Keep notes. You can help another through their healing process.
Move. Do not be totally still. Almost all healing requires you to keep your circulation at tip top shape. Find ways that don’t hurt a lot and that won’t complicate your injury and move and breathe.
Don’t listen to those who say you have to live like that the rest of your life. They just don’t know.
Do what you love to do. I love to dance. At first that was not going to happen. Two years later I said I had to start dancing or I’d go crazy. So I sat and swayed. Soon I was moving a bit. Now I’m jumping around and moving and dancing and experiencing joy at the drum circle in Venice.
Be aware of yourself. If you notice that if you sit for six hours, there’s pain, sit for four to five hours, until you can build up to six hours, then keep building. Get up and stretch. Pay attention, listen to your body. It will communicate! I find that if I drive more than 50miles per day it would set me back. I’d get all tight and I’d be all grouchy and in pain. As much as I could I drove 10 to 25 miles per day. I avoided a lot of time in the car and sitting. We take for granted what it takes to drive: 1) vision – eye muscles- yes to quickly look right and left, etc. 2) Vision-muscles in the neck when we have to turn our heads right, left and up to view mirrors, etc. 3) Steering- using your hands, your shoulders—a lot of stuff is going on- 4) Balance- sitting- the sacrum has to stabilize the body while you’re using one or two hands, one leg and your head is constantly moving. 6) Legs & Hips- we are sitting in an unbalanced position while driving, most weight on the left butt cheek. Sometimes throwing weight onto our right foot when we have to brake suddenly or accelerate. –Å lot is going on. Have a friend drive or take a cab if you can when you can to let your body heal.
-Get an attorney! Try not to be bothered with the B.S. the insurance company tries to put you through. It did nothing but drive me bananas and interfered with my healing.
--After you’re better, write your congressman a letter and let him know you are dissatisfied with the insurance system. The squeaky wheel…….
--Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable. It’s just a phase. You will be okay soon. Do what it takes to heal.
-Fearlessly investigate healing methods . I used – acupuncture, massage, bio-sync massage, Heller work, chiropractic, yoga, meditation and some other methods. Most effective for me were acupuncture, Heller work, and Bio Sync massage.
-Let people help you. If you are blessed enough to have someone in your life to massage your feet and your back and neck or buy you some juice or cook a meal- let the ego go and say thank you. Be strong and independent and all that later on.
Be available to change your life style, it’s temporary. As an actress my look is so important. I changed it after the car accident that prompted me to write this. I was wearing my hair in braids with extensions. The weight of the extra hair really bothered my neck. I took it out. Now, I have gorgeous locks!
Also, as I mentioned I love to dance, okay, and sing. My ribs would go into my lungs, which made it extremely painful to breathe, let alone, take a deep breath and support notes from my diaphragm. ( You vocal folks know what I am talking about.) I stopped breathing correctly. I started taking shallow breaths, that lasted for over a year. It was extremely uncomfortable, in fact it was simply unbearable.
An acupuncture doctor told me I had to breathe. I had to actually focus so I could notice what I was doing. That’s when I noticed how poorly I was breathing. I didn’t even notice. (P,.S. the body needs oxygen!). I made a concerted effort to take deep breaths. Then I focused on normal breaths. It took almost two years to breathe again.
Through the process there is pain. Pain is the indicator your body uses to let you know that something is wrong! So listen. Try not to take too many things to numb yourself. Your body is communicating, listen. Now, sometimes the pain is unbearable, just don’t make pain killers a habit, O.K.? There are homeopathic pain killers available, i.e. Arnica Montana. (and if Marijuana is legal for medicinal purposes, it is reportedly highly effective. added 7.09)
Change your life style continued.
Now, say you love liquor and junk food. This is the time to change your lifestyle. The liver is so important to healing. So, I mentioned I had problems singing. In fact, this is so annoying, the bones in my neck would move and when they were in certain position I was hoarse as a horse! Impossible to sing, barely talk. Oh, that made me angry. Everything I loved to do—I couldn’t—sing, dance, breathe! Sit, go places, be around people—anything.. So I didn’t sing. When the bones were adjusted in whatever way was good for them to be in, I sang almost automatically. I’d be singing and then notice it. That was something. My voice flowing from inside me was cleansing, holy, heartfelt. But I stopped until I could breathe and sing. Two years! Patience. Ugh.
One of my big lessons was in patience and keeping positive. I was so down on myself.
One major problem I had was I worked on staying fine mentally. I didn’t look like I felt inside. People around me, even those I told my situation to, acted like I was okay and would pick me up and try to play and wrestle and invite me to things I couldn’t possibly do. It was like they were extremely insensitive or stupid. I really had to get past that. Once I cried out-loud, alone in my own space, “ Do you really want to see how I feel?!”
My mental strength has been a major force in my healing.
I placed notes around me. I am worthy. Love. Believe, Joy, etc. All around me. It works for me.
I moved people out of my life that added to the pain. Being as sensitive as I have been, I’m available to notice if people are healthy for me or not. Let those who are not, go. Discernment. Let them go! .. Let go!
I got extremely insulted by the insurance companies because I am a go-getter and a workaholic and being unable to open food containers or walk or think or try to get a job, almost drove me bananas. I became frustrated and insulted because my mind doesn’t work the way they kept telling me it was. You know, trying to trick them, getting something for nothing. I really wanted the agent to get rearended and feel what I was feeling so that she would understand. Or at least feel the pain I was in. I wonder how can I be in a car at a red light, foot on the brakes, and a car hit you at 50 miles per hour and I’d be perfectly fine? How? What were they thinking? What is that?
Exercise and stretch.
Be persistent. Be consistent. Keep it moving.
The stretches have been a major part of my healing. I’m “doing my homework” as it were. What I mean is that at home I’m stretching, doing a few exercises, resting, etc. Then I go to a health care practitioner and he/she complements my work to and mine hers! A comment I got from a few of my HCP’s was “ I appreciate your feedback. You are very aware of your body and its helpful when you communicate what you are feeling to me," For example: When he worked on the area at the base of my head-my occiput- I’d feel referral pains in my tailbone, in parts of my head and face. Telling him – he could affect those areas and create a chain of releases, which finally released the entire system of me. On July 20th, 2001, and three days or so ago, I got what I feel is a major release on FEAR.
Fear and healing don’t work well together. This is a major healing point – releasing fear. Fear is related to tension in the body and irregular blood flow. Fear is evident when you panic. I had a lot of fear at first because I live in Los Angeles without my family around and my friends are L.A. friends (New Yorkers will know what that means). So I don’t have anyone to help me, I had never been in an accident where I was so badly injured, so that scared me.
So let’s start racking up the few problems alone, new scary experience. The doctors I was being forced to go to by the insurance company didn’t even touch me. They evaluated me without touching my neck even. Sometimes they didn’t even ask anything. I couldn't see how a doctor could do a true evaluation. When I got the reports back, it was obvious that they weren’t true evaluations. I wonder how they do that and sleep at night. They made a promise to heal. I mean it’s like they want money for doing nothing and writing up a bogus report. That’s why I don’t trust Western medicine.
I had several really bad experiences with regular doctors before this also. I was eating pizza in New York City with some friends before we did a reading of a script. I put peppers and those tiny green things, oregano, on my slice. I was enjoying it and felt a pain under my tongue, like a splinter had inserted itself under my tongue. I tried to pull it out to no avail. When I got home I tried. I woke up and my throat was noticeably swollen and my tongue was swollen so much that I could barely speak or swallow.
In the mirror I could see a splinter like thing embedded in my left spit gland. You know how some people can raise their tongues and spit – from there, the spit gland. So I told the doctor everything. He said he saw nothing and gave me a prescription for Ampicillin, which I wrote on my registration papers that I was allergic to. So I went to two more doctors. Money. Time. No results. It was like they couldn’t hear me. Like I was in a twilight zone. Finally, five days later, being in extreme discomfort, and wasting time, money, and energy with doctors, I took my toe nail clippers, saw the point protruding and oh so gently pulled it out. Of course it solved the problem and I could eat and sing and talk without pain within hours.
I don’t know if it’s a greed/money thing, a female thing, a Black thing, a Black female thing, or what, but its not appropriate and I think doctors should really be available to do what they are paid to do and what we expect them to be able to do – help heal.
Another thing that makes me leery of Western medicine is how I watched my Grandma die. They gave her so many pills—high blood pressure, then something to counteract this and I mean she had two billion pills to take a day. They made her sick, weak. She told them. I don’t know if it's a female thing or a black thing, an elderly thing or a waste of time and I don’t care she’s going to die soon thing, or let’s see what this does. It just seems careless, irresponsible and unethical. I was extremely upset watching her go through so much in her last few years.
My Grandpa on the other hand avoided doctors and lived to be 92. He lived with cancer, no treatment, and was a King until he passed. They were both Native American mixed with African. Both grew up on home made healing which did them well.
Things to point out – Find good doctors who care about themselves, their practice and you. Listen to your instincts about your treatment, be concerned about your body. Communicate with your doctor. If they are not helping, don’t be afraid to find someone who is worthy of taking on the job of healing you. You have that right. It’s your money, your time, your body, and your life.
Fear often drags with it anger and frustration. All of which counteract all healing methods. Remember, it starts with thought, then manifests in the physical. Let your thoughts be clear of fear and anger. This is extremely difficult when dealing with major pain. It takes time to practice breathing and releasing. Notice that you’re agitated and stop. Remember its due to what you’re physically going through. Take moments of peace and joy. So, notice you’re upset, etc., stop and breathe in peace. Let go. Reset.
I’m taking for granted you’re not an angry person to begin with. For those who are this healing can help you experience joy. Eric Butterworth, one of my favorite speakers, says on his tapes, that we get up in the morning and wash up and put on make-up, perfume, clothes. We eat. We get all prepared to walk out the door and forget one of the most important things to prepare before we to – our minds. We need to wake up, envision positive movements, harmonic living and then do the rest of the preparation. Start out knowing you will accomplish your goals during your daily journey.
Fears—My insurance company was giving me major grief. My family and friends were of no help. Doctors seemed not to care. In a time when I needed help outside of myself, I kept reaching and reaching for anyone to help and I finally ended up grabbing hold of me. After the years of being told I’m fine, or , I'll just be in pain for the rest of my life, I stopped listening outside all together and went into the deepest part of me to concentrate on healing beyond the outside world.
Friends didn’t understand because I’d smile and seem joyous in front of them but what they didn’t notice is my visits were short, up to three hours. That was all I could handle. I’d get home, cry, lay down and look sick as well. As an actress, injuries are red lights to anyone wanting to hire me, so I couldn’t be inured if I wanted to work. Now what I was going through was that I’ve built up my reputation with excellence. I have a wonderful reputation in the business and I work hard, I'm on time, no conflicts, good to work with, take direction easily, etc. OK, so now I’m in major pain, can’t be around people for more than two to three hours and then I turn into a pumpkin.. How can I get and keep a job? I can’t sit, stand or do anything for more than three hours. Eight hours? So of course, at this point, I feel like I’m going crazy. This is when I came to understand the plight of the elderly. They are captive on their porches. Their minds, my mind wanted to be out working, dancing, socializing – my body did NOT. My body won.
I have more patience and understanding with people who are disabled and elderly because of this three-plus years experience (11 years as of 7/09). Now, I wait patiently to hold the door. I don’t park in handicapped spaces (Never did before and I won’t now), I help with packages. I did before, (I was a Girl Scout), but my energy is less obligational and more patient and loving, more understanding. It’s not fun being in pain and being unable to do things that excite you into living.
I’m writing all this information in case anyone connects to anything and starts getting revelations and realizes his/her power to heal discomforts in their lives.
I had fear I’d never had before. This is the worst fear. I had no hope. Then under all the fear was a voice saying “Uh, Uh, you will be fine, heal thyself. Forget them. They’re stupid” . Then I had a tape of Eric Butterworth which states that the body is a perfect healing organism. When the right things are in place for healing, then complete healing can occur. Notice how intelligent and perfect your body is. When you cut your hand, a hair cell doesn’t replace it a skin cell does. Your job is to help your body do its job.
Mind/Body
There’s a phrase, mind over body. Your mind can rule the body. You don’t have to be controlled by urges, sex, drugs, etc. The body has control sometimes, don’t get it twisted. There is balance here.
Your body, mind, and spirit are you and they can work in harmony. When injured, your body will demand rest and take it when and where it wants to! Now I’m actually getting rest when I sleep. I didn’t sleep well for about three years. That’s not good. I’d sleep, but rest was a challenge. I thought I was okay, but I’d be so tired while I was working. I needed rest. It’s good when sleep and rest happens at the same time, but sometimes they don’t!
I’d sleep six to ten hours and wake up exhausted, weak, tired. An acupuncturist told me I wasn’t getting enough rest. I was like, “But I’m not doing anything and I’m sleeping a lot.” But you’re not resting. Lin Sister Herb Company in Chinatown New York City fixed that for sure! They put me on some herbs that were a major force in my entire healing process. After taking the herbs, I RESTED. I woke up fresh, well fresher than the 24 months prior! I continued as directed. By the way, Doctor Qi. is one of the best acupuncturists I’ve ever been to. He cares, he heals. As true rest entered my world, my mind became a stronger force. Now I could reason better. Believe it or not! Now my mind could participate in my existence better. Now my mind could tell by body we were going to heal by any means necessary.
Balance- mind –body-spirit.
My mind and my spirit are very close. When I first was hit I went to Whole Foods, and my spirit told me to look at the herbal remedies, so I stood there looking at the rows of herbal remedies. I hadn’t a clue which to choose. My mind/spirit told me to get Cell Salts. I hadn’t a clue as to what they did or anything. I finally finished the bottle and four months later I found that those were necessary for me to take. This happened often with several remedies. I reached inside, listened, obeyed the energy of me. That’s the main force of my healing.. Me. The entire entity of me. Mind, Body, Soul.
I learned you have to be an active participant in your healing. You can’t do whatever at home and then go to the doctor for some miracle cure. You have to work together. We are all connected.
Remember the song: “The ham bone connected to the knee bone, the thigh bones connected to the hip bones, etc.”, OK. It’s true.
Understanding the body is extremely importantly in healing. I had just taken a massage class and completed it with flying colors! My ex-boyfriend told me his mother received massages weekly but it hurt her because she was in an accident. I, having not had that experience, questioned how such a soothing thing as a massage could hurt. Soon, I found out. When I was barely touched on my neck, my jaw, face, or parts of my tailbone, I could feel pain. My sternocleidomastoid, the muscle in the jaw, neck, attaching to the shoulders was extremely unhappy. I realized through acupuncture and massage and personal experience that everything inside me affects something else. This helped to heal me. Because, if I noticed my jaw would hurt, I’d stretch my jaw and my tailbone and my glutes. I would use my feet and hands and do various other stretches. All of that worked to help get movement and movement helps healing. Circulation is extremely important, and when you have blockages, the blood can’t get nutrients to where they are needed. So you are in pain, it gets worse and you get sick. That happened to me. No circulation is a bad thing. Acupuncture and massage greatly aid in circulation. Your homework, rest, massage, diet and stretching.
I worked through an immensely scary time of my life, alone, arose victorious and with a major message—we are all connected. As everything inside of me is connected, so is everything outside of me. Those people who didn’t help me (or maybe they did - they helped me to pull the energy of self and create healing for myself.) Those people who didn’t help me... We are connected. We don’t live on alias islands. We need to respect our connectivity and build to heal our human race. Love begets love. Hate begets hate.
It is our responsibility. We have been acting as scavengers in an abundance of life. It’s like we are in the middle of an ocean drowning each other for the lack of water. We won’t evolve separately, only together. We are all connected. We must work in harmony with the universe or be eradicated. We have no choice.
Focus—
I want to focus on what worked. I’ve explored what I’ve gone through, so you can hopefully see some similarities in your experience and come to know that this healing can happen for you. I had to experiment to find things that worked - medicines, doctors, etc. Here’s what worked.
Arnica Montana- helped in relieving pain without totally taking it away and making me feel like I can run in the Olympics.
Cell Salts - I didn’t know how they helped, but they did.
Herbs from Lin Sister- they gave me herbs for rest and energy. They worked extremely well for me.
Acupuncture from Lin Sister. Dr. Qi is amazing. He has healed people during my healing. I’ve heard their testimonies. I’ve seen these strangers recovery from being out of pain due to his work with them.
Bio-Sync Work - Dana Hubbard Is blessed with a talented hands. His hands seemed to know what to do, where the pain was and how to affect it. This treatment is pretty painless and extremely effective.
Heller Work- I worked with two practitioners, both were major aids in my healing process.
Sleep/Rest -rest is where the body repairs. Get rest. Don’t think. Rest isn’t when your body is laying down and your mind is flying around a mile a minute. You are mind, body, and spirit. Rest all three and at the same time.
Stretches – My homework. I got my major release that led to my complete healing my doing my home work. Gently stretching as per my chiropractor, Dr. Mc Clain’s advice. She’s focuses on sports injuries and was very knowledgeable and gave me options that helped a lot. She also made sure I was doing my stretches. She became my conscience for a while until my conscience took over and realize the importance of doing my stretches.
Exercise - Movement. At first I didn’t move. The doctors told me to rest . My relationship between my mind and body has improved to a point when I know how much exercise to do. I see my limits. I notice my pain thresholds. I instinctively increased my amount of movement and exercise as I healed. Building a strong healing consciousness as I healed.
Balance- Let go of negative people around you, even those you love. They love you so much that they can’t help but hurt you or affect you negatively. Give them major space or let them go. Release negative thoughts. Release negative habits.
Embrace- Embrace healing. Embrace the knowledge that you can and will completely heal with divine order. Embrace the knowing that you will heal. Embrace love. Embrace the thought that we are all connected. Embrace the reality that we are all connected and the phrase, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you”. I embraced the first commandment, ” I am the Lord thy God, ye shall have no other Gods before Me”-- No other Gods. No God of pain or fear or doubt. Embrace the power, the mightiness, the worthiness of you. Embrace joy.
Breathe - Oxygen is extremely important to humans. Breathing helps feed your body what it needs to exist in harmony. If you notice tension, anger, pain, -- stop. Take time to breathe. Turn off the radio, television, stop and breathe. Take slow, deep breaths. Envision the ocean or something soothing if you like.
Envision - Envisioning is a major tool. Envisioning is an active subconscious/conscious activity that will manifest in the physical world. Envision yourself as your really want to be. Healthy. Completely. Believe. (You can’t have doubt or it won’t work). See it clearly. Know it! Feel it! Start remembering how it feels without pain.
Recall the feeling and put it back into your body system through your mind. Dream it. Sometimes we’re here in pain so long, we forget what it feels like to feel good. There’s an acting technique or the method that requires the actor to recall an experience and relive it in the present. Feeling exactly what you felt. I.e. coffee cup. Here, try it. Think of your favorite mug. Hold it. How old were you? How did it feel to hold it? Hold it. Is it hot? Did you hold it by the handles or by the bottom? With two or one hand? Smell the coffee, tea or hot chocolate in your cup. How did it make you feel to have your favorite cup with your favorite beverage? Feel that . Feel it. Joy? Excitement? Peace? Safety? Comfort? Feel it? What do you have on? Where are you? Who else is there? Keep holding your cup. Re-experience it all. Drink from your cup. UMM good. Delicious. Taste it. Blow on it if its too hot. This is a form of recall you can use to remember pain free times and call them back into your muscle memory. Instead of using any energy for fear or being upset, reset-focus-remember-envision and breathe. Now, embrace tomorrow when you awake, you feel vibrant, harmonious, breathing easily and joy and peace surrounds you. Envision your complete healing. Know it is true. Let go.
Schedule healing time daily or weekly. We are so busy nowadays, sometimes we almost forget to eat. Place fifteen minutes to two hours aside to do healing things.
My biggest mistake was listening to others, especially those who said negative things to me like, "You won’t heal." When my instincts warned me and I chose a different way than what I was shown, when I chose not to listen, I caused myself to go through challenges. Just because I didn’t trust something that didn’t make sense to me – I thought for myself - I didn't listen, I didn’t trust. I didn’t trust my instincts. As I listened I began to feel the flow. Things are magnetically moving now. It’s looking nice.
Peace Love Light
Samaria
2001
Ways to Heal Completely:
Know that your body is perfect and will heal perfectly.
Allow time for the healing process. Patience is key.
Don’t share your ailment with everyone. If you can help it, the less energy spent on it the better.
Trust your instincts in reference to your medical care. In my experience I found that often physicians don’t have the time or care to do what it takes to help you. You have to find those who will. So don’t be ashamed or afraid to change doctors.
Don’t let the insurance boundaries affect your treatment. For some reason many of things that can heal you are looked on by Western medicine as stupid. Again, trust your instincts, do what it takes to get the care that you need to heal. Soon we will restructure the system to actually aid in our healing.
Don’t give up. It’s not over till you give up. Don’t! give up.
Keep peace in your space. Avoid fear and negativity or resentment during healing.
Laugh as much as you can. Find joy in every moment.
Eat to heal. Ingest things that feed your system. Also eat stuff that makes you happy, but as stated more importantly, eat things the bodies needs.
Drink water,
I always say, “You know how it is when you don’t do the dishes and they sit in the sink and get crusty with food on them?"
Imagine that in your body, food just sitting and getting crusty and hard. Now you know if you let the dishes sit in water overnight, it makes them a billion times easier to wash the next day. Keep your system flowing, drink water and more water.
Rest. Don’t just get sleep, get rest. Rest helps healing.
Stop with the sugar and the coffee. No, don’t drink alcohol, Rest.
Whoever, or what ever may have caused the situation, release the anger towards them. Live in love. Peace. Breathe peace as much as possible.. You see pain really makes you want to hurt someone. Those thoughts distract from healing. They are like a deflecting field to healing. Let it go.
Let go. When you finally find a health care practitioner you trust, relax and let them help you. If you are getting a massage, let the practitioner know how they are affecting you and what you are feeling. Keep notes. You can help another through their healing process.
Move. Do not be totally still. Almost all healing requires you to keep your circulation at tip top shape. Find ways that don’t hurt a lot and that won’t complicate your injury and move and breathe.
Don’t listen to those who say you have to live like that the rest of your life. They just don’t know.
Do what you love to do. I love to dance. At first that was not going to happen. Two years later I said I had to start dancing or I’d go crazy. So I sat and swayed. Soon I was moving a bit. Now I’m jumping around and moving and dancing and experiencing joy at the drum circle in Venice.
Be aware of yourself. If you notice that if you sit for six hours, there’s pain, sit for four to five hours, until you can build up to six hours, then keep building. Get up and stretch. Pay attention, listen to your body. It will communicate! I find that if I drive more than 50miles per day it would set me back. I’d get all tight and I’d be all grouchy and in pain. As much as I could I drove 10 to 25 miles per day. I avoided a lot of time in the car and sitting. We take for granted what it takes to drive: 1) vision – eye muscles- yes to quickly look right and left, etc. 2) Vision-muscles in the neck when we have to turn our heads right, left and up to view mirrors, etc. 3) Steering- using your hands, your shoulders—a lot of stuff is going on- 4) Balance- sitting- the sacrum has to stabilize the body while you’re using one or two hands, one leg and your head is constantly moving. 6) Legs & Hips- we are sitting in an unbalanced position while driving, most weight on the left butt cheek. Sometimes throwing weight onto our right foot when we have to brake suddenly or accelerate. –Å lot is going on. Have a friend drive or take a cab if you can when you can to let your body heal.
-Get an attorney! Try not to be bothered with the B.S. the insurance company tries to put you through. It did nothing but drive me bananas and interfered with my healing.
--After you’re better, write your congressman a letter and let him know you are dissatisfied with the insurance system. The squeaky wheel…….
--Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable. It’s just a phase. You will be okay soon. Do what it takes to heal.
-Fearlessly investigate healing methods . I used – acupuncture, massage, bio-sync massage, Heller work, chiropractic, yoga, meditation and some other methods. Most effective for me were acupuncture, Heller work, and Bio Sync massage.
-Let people help you. If you are blessed enough to have someone in your life to massage your feet and your back and neck or buy you some juice or cook a meal- let the ego go and say thank you. Be strong and independent and all that later on.
Be available to change your life style, it’s temporary. As an actress my look is so important. I changed it after the car accident that prompted me to write this. I was wearing my hair in braids with extensions. The weight of the extra hair really bothered my neck. I took it out. Now, I have gorgeous locks!
Also, as I mentioned I love to dance, okay, and sing. My ribs would go into my lungs, which made it extremely painful to breathe, let alone, take a deep breath and support notes from my diaphragm. ( You vocal folks know what I am talking about.) I stopped breathing correctly. I started taking shallow breaths, that lasted for over a year. It was extremely uncomfortable, in fact it was simply unbearable.
An acupuncture doctor told me I had to breathe. I had to actually focus so I could notice what I was doing. That’s when I noticed how poorly I was breathing. I didn’t even notice. (P,.S. the body needs oxygen!). I made a concerted effort to take deep breaths. Then I focused on normal breaths. It took almost two years to breathe again.
Through the process there is pain. Pain is the indicator your body uses to let you know that something is wrong! So listen. Try not to take too many things to numb yourself. Your body is communicating, listen. Now, sometimes the pain is unbearable, just don’t make pain killers a habit, O.K.? There are homeopathic pain killers available, i.e. Arnica Montana. (and if Marijuana is legal for medicinal purposes, it is reportedly highly effective. added 7.09)
Change your life style continued.
Now, say you love liquor and junk food. This is the time to change your lifestyle. The liver is so important to healing. So, I mentioned I had problems singing. In fact, this is so annoying, the bones in my neck would move and when they were in certain position I was hoarse as a horse! Impossible to sing, barely talk. Oh, that made me angry. Everything I loved to do—I couldn’t—sing, dance, breathe! Sit, go places, be around people—anything.. So I didn’t sing. When the bones were adjusted in whatever way was good for them to be in, I sang almost automatically. I’d be singing and then notice it. That was something. My voice flowing from inside me was cleansing, holy, heartfelt. But I stopped until I could breathe and sing. Two years! Patience. Ugh.
One of my big lessons was in patience and keeping positive. I was so down on myself.
One major problem I had was I worked on staying fine mentally. I didn’t look like I felt inside. People around me, even those I told my situation to, acted like I was okay and would pick me up and try to play and wrestle and invite me to things I couldn’t possibly do. It was like they were extremely insensitive or stupid. I really had to get past that. Once I cried out-loud, alone in my own space, “ Do you really want to see how I feel?!”
My mental strength has been a major force in my healing.
I placed notes around me. I am worthy. Love. Believe, Joy, etc. All around me. It works for me.
I moved people out of my life that added to the pain. Being as sensitive as I have been, I’m available to notice if people are healthy for me or not. Let those who are not, go. Discernment. Let them go! .. Let go!
I got extremely insulted by the insurance companies because I am a go-getter and a workaholic and being unable to open food containers or walk or think or try to get a job, almost drove me bananas. I became frustrated and insulted because my mind doesn’t work the way they kept telling me it was. You know, trying to trick them, getting something for nothing. I really wanted the agent to get rearended and feel what I was feeling so that she would understand. Or at least feel the pain I was in. I wonder how can I be in a car at a red light, foot on the brakes, and a car hit you at 50 miles per hour and I’d be perfectly fine? How? What were they thinking? What is that?
Exercise and stretch.
Be persistent. Be consistent. Keep it moving.
The stretches have been a major part of my healing. I’m “doing my homework” as it were. What I mean is that at home I’m stretching, doing a few exercises, resting, etc. Then I go to a health care practitioner and he/she complements my work to and mine hers! A comment I got from a few of my HCP’s was “ I appreciate your feedback. You are very aware of your body and its helpful when you communicate what you are feeling to me," For example: When he worked on the area at the base of my head-my occiput- I’d feel referral pains in my tailbone, in parts of my head and face. Telling him – he could affect those areas and create a chain of releases, which finally released the entire system of me. On July 20th, 2001, and three days or so ago, I got what I feel is a major release on FEAR.
Fear and healing don’t work well together. This is a major healing point – releasing fear. Fear is related to tension in the body and irregular blood flow. Fear is evident when you panic. I had a lot of fear at first because I live in Los Angeles without my family around and my friends are L.A. friends (New Yorkers will know what that means). So I don’t have anyone to help me, I had never been in an accident where I was so badly injured, so that scared me.
So let’s start racking up the few problems alone, new scary experience. The doctors I was being forced to go to by the insurance company didn’t even touch me. They evaluated me without touching my neck even. Sometimes they didn’t even ask anything. I couldn't see how a doctor could do a true evaluation. When I got the reports back, it was obvious that they weren’t true evaluations. I wonder how they do that and sleep at night. They made a promise to heal. I mean it’s like they want money for doing nothing and writing up a bogus report. That’s why I don’t trust Western medicine.
I had several really bad experiences with regular doctors before this also. I was eating pizza in New York City with some friends before we did a reading of a script. I put peppers and those tiny green things, oregano, on my slice. I was enjoying it and felt a pain under my tongue, like a splinter had inserted itself under my tongue. I tried to pull it out to no avail. When I got home I tried. I woke up and my throat was noticeably swollen and my tongue was swollen so much that I could barely speak or swallow.
In the mirror I could see a splinter like thing embedded in my left spit gland. You know how some people can raise their tongues and spit – from there, the spit gland. So I told the doctor everything. He said he saw nothing and gave me a prescription for Ampicillin, which I wrote on my registration papers that I was allergic to. So I went to two more doctors. Money. Time. No results. It was like they couldn’t hear me. Like I was in a twilight zone. Finally, five days later, being in extreme discomfort, and wasting time, money, and energy with doctors, I took my toe nail clippers, saw the point protruding and oh so gently pulled it out. Of course it solved the problem and I could eat and sing and talk without pain within hours.
I don’t know if it’s a greed/money thing, a female thing, a Black thing, a Black female thing, or what, but its not appropriate and I think doctors should really be available to do what they are paid to do and what we expect them to be able to do – help heal.
Another thing that makes me leery of Western medicine is how I watched my Grandma die. They gave her so many pills—high blood pressure, then something to counteract this and I mean she had two billion pills to take a day. They made her sick, weak. She told them. I don’t know if it's a female thing or a black thing, an elderly thing or a waste of time and I don’t care she’s going to die soon thing, or let’s see what this does. It just seems careless, irresponsible and unethical. I was extremely upset watching her go through so much in her last few years.
My Grandpa on the other hand avoided doctors and lived to be 92. He lived with cancer, no treatment, and was a King until he passed. They were both Native American mixed with African. Both grew up on home made healing which did them well.
Things to point out – Find good doctors who care about themselves, their practice and you. Listen to your instincts about your treatment, be concerned about your body. Communicate with your doctor. If they are not helping, don’t be afraid to find someone who is worthy of taking on the job of healing you. You have that right. It’s your money, your time, your body, and your life.
Fear often drags with it anger and frustration. All of which counteract all healing methods. Remember, it starts with thought, then manifests in the physical. Let your thoughts be clear of fear and anger. This is extremely difficult when dealing with major pain. It takes time to practice breathing and releasing. Notice that you’re agitated and stop. Remember its due to what you’re physically going through. Take moments of peace and joy. So, notice you’re upset, etc., stop and breathe in peace. Let go. Reset.
I’m taking for granted you’re not an angry person to begin with. For those who are this healing can help you experience joy. Eric Butterworth, one of my favorite speakers, says on his tapes, that we get up in the morning and wash up and put on make-up, perfume, clothes. We eat. We get all prepared to walk out the door and forget one of the most important things to prepare before we to – our minds. We need to wake up, envision positive movements, harmonic living and then do the rest of the preparation. Start out knowing you will accomplish your goals during your daily journey.
Fears—My insurance company was giving me major grief. My family and friends were of no help. Doctors seemed not to care. In a time when I needed help outside of myself, I kept reaching and reaching for anyone to help and I finally ended up grabbing hold of me. After the years of being told I’m fine, or , I'll just be in pain for the rest of my life, I stopped listening outside all together and went into the deepest part of me to concentrate on healing beyond the outside world.
Friends didn’t understand because I’d smile and seem joyous in front of them but what they didn’t notice is my visits were short, up to three hours. That was all I could handle. I’d get home, cry, lay down and look sick as well. As an actress, injuries are red lights to anyone wanting to hire me, so I couldn’t be inured if I wanted to work. Now what I was going through was that I’ve built up my reputation with excellence. I have a wonderful reputation in the business and I work hard, I'm on time, no conflicts, good to work with, take direction easily, etc. OK, so now I’m in major pain, can’t be around people for more than two to three hours and then I turn into a pumpkin.. How can I get and keep a job? I can’t sit, stand or do anything for more than three hours. Eight hours? So of course, at this point, I feel like I’m going crazy. This is when I came to understand the plight of the elderly. They are captive on their porches. Their minds, my mind wanted to be out working, dancing, socializing – my body did NOT. My body won.
I have more patience and understanding with people who are disabled and elderly because of this three-plus years experience (11 years as of 7/09). Now, I wait patiently to hold the door. I don’t park in handicapped spaces (Never did before and I won’t now), I help with packages. I did before, (I was a Girl Scout), but my energy is less obligational and more patient and loving, more understanding. It’s not fun being in pain and being unable to do things that excite you into living.
I’m writing all this information in case anyone connects to anything and starts getting revelations and realizes his/her power to heal discomforts in their lives.
I had fear I’d never had before. This is the worst fear. I had no hope. Then under all the fear was a voice saying “Uh, Uh, you will be fine, heal thyself. Forget them. They’re stupid” . Then I had a tape of Eric Butterworth which states that the body is a perfect healing organism. When the right things are in place for healing, then complete healing can occur. Notice how intelligent and perfect your body is. When you cut your hand, a hair cell doesn’t replace it a skin cell does. Your job is to help your body do its job.
Mind/Body
There’s a phrase, mind over body. Your mind can rule the body. You don’t have to be controlled by urges, sex, drugs, etc. The body has control sometimes, don’t get it twisted. There is balance here.
Your body, mind, and spirit are you and they can work in harmony. When injured, your body will demand rest and take it when and where it wants to! Now I’m actually getting rest when I sleep. I didn’t sleep well for about three years. That’s not good. I’d sleep, but rest was a challenge. I thought I was okay, but I’d be so tired while I was working. I needed rest. It’s good when sleep and rest happens at the same time, but sometimes they don’t!
I’d sleep six to ten hours and wake up exhausted, weak, tired. An acupuncturist told me I wasn’t getting enough rest. I was like, “But I’m not doing anything and I’m sleeping a lot.” But you’re not resting. Lin Sister Herb Company in Chinatown New York City fixed that for sure! They put me on some herbs that were a major force in my entire healing process. After taking the herbs, I RESTED. I woke up fresh, well fresher than the 24 months prior! I continued as directed. By the way, Doctor Qi. is one of the best acupuncturists I’ve ever been to. He cares, he heals. As true rest entered my world, my mind became a stronger force. Now I could reason better. Believe it or not! Now my mind could participate in my existence better. Now my mind could tell by body we were going to heal by any means necessary.
Balance- mind –body-spirit.
My mind and my spirit are very close. When I first was hit I went to Whole Foods, and my spirit told me to look at the herbal remedies, so I stood there looking at the rows of herbal remedies. I hadn’t a clue which to choose. My mind/spirit told me to get Cell Salts. I hadn’t a clue as to what they did or anything. I finally finished the bottle and four months later I found that those were necessary for me to take. This happened often with several remedies. I reached inside, listened, obeyed the energy of me. That’s the main force of my healing.. Me. The entire entity of me. Mind, Body, Soul.
I learned you have to be an active participant in your healing. You can’t do whatever at home and then go to the doctor for some miracle cure. You have to work together. We are all connected.
Remember the song: “The ham bone connected to the knee bone, the thigh bones connected to the hip bones, etc.”, OK. It’s true.
Understanding the body is extremely importantly in healing. I had just taken a massage class and completed it with flying colors! My ex-boyfriend told me his mother received massages weekly but it hurt her because she was in an accident. I, having not had that experience, questioned how such a soothing thing as a massage could hurt. Soon, I found out. When I was barely touched on my neck, my jaw, face, or parts of my tailbone, I could feel pain. My sternocleidomastoid, the muscle in the jaw, neck, attaching to the shoulders was extremely unhappy. I realized through acupuncture and massage and personal experience that everything inside me affects something else. This helped to heal me. Because, if I noticed my jaw would hurt, I’d stretch my jaw and my tailbone and my glutes. I would use my feet and hands and do various other stretches. All of that worked to help get movement and movement helps healing. Circulation is extremely important, and when you have blockages, the blood can’t get nutrients to where they are needed. So you are in pain, it gets worse and you get sick. That happened to me. No circulation is a bad thing. Acupuncture and massage greatly aid in circulation. Your homework, rest, massage, diet and stretching.
I worked through an immensely scary time of my life, alone, arose victorious and with a major message—we are all connected. As everything inside of me is connected, so is everything outside of me. Those people who didn’t help me (or maybe they did - they helped me to pull the energy of self and create healing for myself.) Those people who didn’t help me... We are connected. We don’t live on alias islands. We need to respect our connectivity and build to heal our human race. Love begets love. Hate begets hate.
It is our responsibility. We have been acting as scavengers in an abundance of life. It’s like we are in the middle of an ocean drowning each other for the lack of water. We won’t evolve separately, only together. We are all connected. We must work in harmony with the universe or be eradicated. We have no choice.
Focus—
I want to focus on what worked. I’ve explored what I’ve gone through, so you can hopefully see some similarities in your experience and come to know that this healing can happen for you. I had to experiment to find things that worked - medicines, doctors, etc. Here’s what worked.
Arnica Montana- helped in relieving pain without totally taking it away and making me feel like I can run in the Olympics.
Cell Salts - I didn’t know how they helped, but they did.
Herbs from Lin Sister- they gave me herbs for rest and energy. They worked extremely well for me.
Acupuncture from Lin Sister. Dr. Qi is amazing. He has healed people during my healing. I’ve heard their testimonies. I’ve seen these strangers recovery from being out of pain due to his work with them.
Bio-Sync Work - Dana Hubbard Is blessed with a talented hands. His hands seemed to know what to do, where the pain was and how to affect it. This treatment is pretty painless and extremely effective.
Heller Work- I worked with two practitioners, both were major aids in my healing process.
Sleep/Rest -rest is where the body repairs. Get rest. Don’t think. Rest isn’t when your body is laying down and your mind is flying around a mile a minute. You are mind, body, and spirit. Rest all three and at the same time.
Stretches – My homework. I got my major release that led to my complete healing my doing my home work. Gently stretching as per my chiropractor, Dr. Mc Clain’s advice. She’s focuses on sports injuries and was very knowledgeable and gave me options that helped a lot. She also made sure I was doing my stretches. She became my conscience for a while until my conscience took over and realize the importance of doing my stretches.
Exercise - Movement. At first I didn’t move. The doctors told me to rest . My relationship between my mind and body has improved to a point when I know how much exercise to do. I see my limits. I notice my pain thresholds. I instinctively increased my amount of movement and exercise as I healed. Building a strong healing consciousness as I healed.
Balance- Let go of negative people around you, even those you love. They love you so much that they can’t help but hurt you or affect you negatively. Give them major space or let them go. Release negative thoughts. Release negative habits.
Embrace- Embrace healing. Embrace the knowledge that you can and will completely heal with divine order. Embrace the knowing that you will heal. Embrace love. Embrace the thought that we are all connected. Embrace the reality that we are all connected and the phrase, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you”. I embraced the first commandment, ” I am the Lord thy God, ye shall have no other Gods before Me”-- No other Gods. No God of pain or fear or doubt. Embrace the power, the mightiness, the worthiness of you. Embrace joy.
Breathe - Oxygen is extremely important to humans. Breathing helps feed your body what it needs to exist in harmony. If you notice tension, anger, pain, -- stop. Take time to breathe. Turn off the radio, television, stop and breathe. Take slow, deep breaths. Envision the ocean or something soothing if you like.
Envision - Envisioning is a major tool. Envisioning is an active subconscious/conscious activity that will manifest in the physical world. Envision yourself as your really want to be. Healthy. Completely. Believe. (You can’t have doubt or it won’t work). See it clearly. Know it! Feel it! Start remembering how it feels without pain.
Recall the feeling and put it back into your body system through your mind. Dream it. Sometimes we’re here in pain so long, we forget what it feels like to feel good. There’s an acting technique or the method that requires the actor to recall an experience and relive it in the present. Feeling exactly what you felt. I.e. coffee cup. Here, try it. Think of your favorite mug. Hold it. How old were you? How did it feel to hold it? Hold it. Is it hot? Did you hold it by the handles or by the bottom? With two or one hand? Smell the coffee, tea or hot chocolate in your cup. How did it make you feel to have your favorite cup with your favorite beverage? Feel that . Feel it. Joy? Excitement? Peace? Safety? Comfort? Feel it? What do you have on? Where are you? Who else is there? Keep holding your cup. Re-experience it all. Drink from your cup. UMM good. Delicious. Taste it. Blow on it if its too hot. This is a form of recall you can use to remember pain free times and call them back into your muscle memory. Instead of using any energy for fear or being upset, reset-focus-remember-envision and breathe. Now, embrace tomorrow when you awake, you feel vibrant, harmonious, breathing easily and joy and peace surrounds you. Envision your complete healing. Know it is true. Let go.
Schedule healing time daily or weekly. We are so busy nowadays, sometimes we almost forget to eat. Place fifteen minutes to two hours aside to do healing things.
My biggest mistake was listening to others, especially those who said negative things to me like, "You won’t heal." When my instincts warned me and I chose a different way than what I was shown, when I chose not to listen, I caused myself to go through challenges. Just because I didn’t trust something that didn’t make sense to me – I thought for myself - I didn't listen, I didn’t trust. I didn’t trust my instincts. As I listened I began to feel the flow. Things are magnetically moving now. It’s looking nice.
Peace Love Light
Samaria
2001
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